Surviving Breastfeeding a Newborn

I don’t think anyone warned me, or if they did I didn't listen, how time-consuming breastfeeding a newborn is. It pretty much takes over your life at first and the cluster feeds can be epic. The key to surviving it, and getting breastfeeding off to a positive start, is to accept this and make it as comfortable as possible.

So here are my tips for surviving those first few months…

• Always have a wee before you start a feed - you could be there for ages!
• Set up a breastfeeding station somewhere comfy, with everything you need at arm’s reach. Mine was on the sofa and we brought down a bedside table to store everything I needed.
• Some people like v-shaped breastfeeding cushions but I found them too bulky and claustrophobic. I like having a small cushion to shove under my elbow.
• Make sure you have your phone, charger and the TV remote handy - you do not want to get stuck watching Jeremy Kyle. A good box set helps pass the time. I loved Desperate Housewives.
• Breastfeeding is thirsty work so have plenty of water ready. I gave up trying to drink hot drinks.
• It also makes you ravenous and burns calories - enjoy the cake and forget about your mum tum until life becomes more normal. Oats might help milk production which was my excuse for scoffing flapjacks.
• It can get messy. Have a stack of muslins to mop up milk, sick and tears.
• In the early days when the baby first latches it can be excruciating. Chomping Haribo gets you through those toe-curling moments.
• It shouldn’t be painful, and pain does indicate something isn’t quite right, but while you and baby figure out what you’re doing it probably is going to hurt. It’s ok to take paracetamol or ibuprofen if you need to.
• Nipples take a while to toughen up and can get a bit damaged. Lansinoh lanolin cream is expensive but really helps healing. You don’t need too much and you don't need to wash it off before feeding again.
• Fresh air also helps healing and so does your own milk!
• If they get really bad, Jelonet gauze will heal deep cracks.
• While you feed on one side the other will leak so wear pads at all times. Lansinoh are really absorbent.
• When your milk comes in your boobs will get huge and tender. A cold Savoy cabbage leaf in your bra feels amazing! Hand expressing in a warm bath can also help. Squeeze the boob not the nipple.
• Engorged boobs are difficult for baby to latch on to. Express a bit off first to soften them.
• Having a c-section can delay your milk a bit but it will sort itself out.
• The first let-down can be too fast for baby to swallow so let this bit spray into a muslin until it slows down.
• Experiment with different positions to find what works for you both. I like cross cradle.
• If you both get frustrated and upset, skin to skin contact will make you both calm again. When we were struggling to latch I found it helpful to lie on the bed, baby in just a nappy and me with my top off, and try again either lying on our sides facing each other or with me lying back on pillows with baby placed on my chest. Google biological nurturing.
• The hands, oh my goodness, the hands will drive you crazy! Tiny hands that flap about and get in the way and scratch with their teeny razor sharp nails. Exploring with their hands is an important part of baby’s development so try not to let it bother you, but when it gets too much just pop on some scratch mits or fold over the sleepsuit mits. You can even feed with baby swaddled.
• Mistakes I made were being too tentative and pressing on the back of his head - this just makes latch too shallow. Keep your hand on their shoulder blades and guide them quickly and firmly, chin first, when they open their mouth. It’s harder than it sounds but you will get the hang of it.
• Watching other people and getting experienced people to watch you is very helpful. Breastfeeding groups are an amazing source of support. Check out your local Children’s Centre or ask your health visitor where your nearest group meets.
• Hopefully you won’t need to, but you can pay for a lactation consultant to come to your house to help you out.
• Facebook groups can also be a fantastic place to turn for advice, especially at 3am. Breastfeeding mums are always awake!
• Night feeds can feel never-ending. Don’t let it get you down - it will end and you’ll weirdly miss it when it does! Get comfortable and enjoy looking at your adorable little baby.
• A co-sleeper cot means you stay warm and snug.
• Keep lights low to help baby learn the difference between day and night.
• You’ll need your water, food, muslins, phone and Lansinoh upstairs too.
• Soft night-time bras are essential for keeping pads in or you’ll wake up in a puddle.
• Don’t waste money on breastfeeding tops - they seem to reveal more than ordinary clothes. One up, one down is the easiest way to go. Wear a baggy top you can lift up with a vest underneath that you can either pull down or unclip like a feeding bra.
• When you start feeding out and about a floaty scarf can give you a bit of extra protection without smothering you both.
• Feeding in public sounds scarier than it is. Be confident and go for it. You’ll find people are either supportive or oblivious.

Breastfeeding is a 2 person mission and your partner has some important jobs to do.

• Keeping you supplied with food and drink.
• Keeping the house tidy - you are exempt from all housework.
• Managing visitors. You’ll probably want peace, quiet and to be able to sit with your boobs out. Be honest about who you want round and how long they can stay. Don't delay feeds just because people want to cuddle your baby. Feeding a ravenous baby is much harder than feeding a hungry baby.
• Being supportive, encouraging and believing in breastfeeding. These crazy breastfeeding facts helped my husband get behind it.

People who are used to formula feeding, or just not used to babies, will say some really annoying, unhelpful things. Stick this list of banned phrases up where guests will see it with a list of forfeits - wash up, make everyone a cup of tea, give me a foot rub etc.

• “He can’t be hungry again already!”
• “But he’s only just fed!”
• “What a greedy baby!”
• “You must not be making enough milk.”
• “My baby didn’t feed this much.”
• “Give him a bottle to make him sleep.”
• “He’s not hungry, he just wants comfort.”
• “You’ll spoil him by feeding him this much.”
• “He’s only using you as a dummy!” (That’s my most hated saying; it’s so backward!)

I found it really helpful to remember these things when it got relentless or people made me doubt myself.

• Newborn tummies are tiny. They fill up and empty very quickly so need lots of refilling.
• Breastmilk is perfect so can be digested quickly, meaning they are ready for the next feed quicker than a formula fed baby who takes longer to digest something unnatural.
• Babies have a need for and a right to seek comfort as well as food.
• Latched on to your boob is the safest, warmest, loveliest place for your baby to be.
• When babies are about to make a physical or developmental leap they need fuel to do it, so they feed more. You will be rewarded with an exciting new development to admire.
• Today’s demand creates tomorrow’s supply. You will make enough milk but baby has to let your boobs know first.
• This newborn phase does not last long.
• You are keeping your baby alive - that is AMAZING!

I’m worried this post has made it sound awful and will put your off. It’s definitely not meant to do that! I think it’s important to be honest that it’s not easy because I wasn’t prepared for that and I felt like a total failure at times. But I also learned that there is a way through it. Obstacles can be overcome and problems can be solved. I’m so glad I stuck it out. Now feeding is easy, convenient, wonderful and I really enjoy it.